Lost Memories

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I did not have to think long about this week’s weekly challenge – Moved by Music.  About a year ago I was sitting at work with my mp3 player set on random when a song came on by Fleetwood Mac called Silver Springs.  I was literally blown away, I am not sure exactly why it caused this reaction but it got very strong as the song went on, especially when Stevie Nicks starts the chorus – “Time cast a spell on you, but you won’t forget me, I know I could have loved you but would not let me…”

Whatever it was, I had to get up from my desk and go outside, I did get a bit choked up and I don’t know why.  I don’t know why I am still reacting this way to this song.  When I watched the video tonight, it hit me again.

I am guessing there was a relationship in my past that I somehow attached to this song, and apparently there was a lot of pain involved.  A while back, I started down a path in life where I was told ‘more will be revealed’, what I have learned is that memories have returned a little bit at a time.  I can’t imagine what would happen if everything I ever did was suddenly revealed to me, however I can see a vision of me pulling my hair out while running into traffic!

Silver Springs is such a powerful song about lost love and I would imagine Lindsey Buckingham felt about an inch tall as Stevie was singing about their relationship and how it ended.  I have had lost love in my life, but not a huge number of relationships so this should not be so difficult for me, but it is.  I guess my mind has decided to keep this little facet of my past hidden for a while longer, which I am okay with.  I have a wonderful life now, happily married and loving life as it comes.  And even if the floodgates holding back the memories do burst open a bit more and this mystery is solved, what it will probably bring is a profound sense of loss and more than likely some amends will need to be made.  All in all I still love this song and even though it makes me feel goofy and mushy, I will continue to listen to it.  I will just keep a hanky near.


5 responses to “Lost Memories

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